Can I Sew in Boob Pads?

I picked up my trisuit yesterday.  If you recall from my previous post, the trisuit isn’t exactly built for flattery.

I knew the biggest problem I’d have with the trisuit was the fact that it’s a spandex unitard.  That means no boob pads.  For a girl without boobs, this poses a problem.  For a girl that is shaped like a rectangle (from the front and side), this poses a problem.

Ladies and gents, I bring you the most unflattering outfit I will ever wear in my 20s.


I have contemplated sewing in tiny boob pads so that I at least look like a woman in the all women’s triathlon.  However, I think the little pads will soak up too much water in my swim and I’m sure it wouldn’t be very attractive (or time-efficient) to have to squeeze the water out of my chesticles during the race.

Jeremy tried to assure me that there would be a lot of other flat-chested women in the race as well.  I have my doubts.

But if this doesn’t work out, Summer Olympics 2012 here I come!  I think I have a pretty good chance for passing as a 16 year old gymnast.

11 Comments

Filed under Charm City Kim Runs

11 responses to “Can I Sew in Boob Pads?

  1. While I can totally appreciate your flat boobedness, can you imagine if you had a C or D cup and not having and chest support? Is there even any material in there for pretend support? AGH! Can you imagine the uni-boob that would create with a sports bra under it?

    There is a sports bra built in (and that accounts for some extra boob squishing) but I’m sure for a large-chested gal, this probably wouldn’t be the most supportive or comfortable getup!

  2. Honestly, I couldn’t pay attention to your lack of boobs because I was distracted by your slamming body. I’m writhing with jealousy right now.
    But if you insist on getting inserts, I’d go with 3ft pointy stakes; that way, you can use them to impale your competition. It’s all about function.

    Thanks! And I really like your idea. I could pop some bike tires of the competition after my swim… that’s genius!

  3. Seriously, I would kill to look like you in that suit. I have no boobs, but I totally have a butt. I’d rather be a rectangle than a pear.

    I don’t have boobs or a butt! I’m completely shapeless. Believe me – enjoy your butt!!

  4. Good lord woman! Your legs are fab! You look like you’re in fantastic shape – screw the not having boobs thing. I feel your pain, but you still kick ass!

    Thanks for the compliments!

  5. Um, excuse me but your total hottedness overall blinds me to any lack of boobage. I would kill for your thighs. In return I will share some of my boobage with you. GLADLY.

    Haha! Don’t think I won’t fly out to you to collect. :-)

  6. You look fantabulous in that outfit. May I have your thighs? hehe, good luck!

    Thank you! And I will trade you my thighs for some boobs! :-)

  7. Girl you are trés sexy! Like everyone else, I’m envious. And a little turned on. :)

    Haha! Thanks for the compliments. Everyone has been so nice – I feel like I need to wear spandex unitards more often. :-)

  8. You can’t be an Olympic gymnast. You’re about 2 feet too tall. All female gymnasts are smidgets.

    Crap! You’re right – stupid tall genes.

  9. I think you look great! The blue suit brings out the color in your eyes. LOL No seriously, don’t beat yourself up! I wish I could just wear that outfit for gp in the summer. ;-)

    Aw – thanks, CAG!

  10. peteshu

    don’t sweat it. if i may say so, that outfit is more flattering on you than flattening. ;-)

    Well thank you!

  11. ssb

    I think you have a fantastic body. Your shape is what i consider perfect. I know I’m just one guy. But i think your amazing and think your very attractive! I really think you’re amazing.

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