Daily Archives: July 1, 2009

Some Additional Reasons Why My Husband Irritates Me

I love him.  I really really love him.  I can’t stay mad at him.  He makes me laugh.  We share the same interests, viewpoints, values, etc.

But I can’t shake off how his ability to do everything better than me annoys me.

Examples:

He’s a better athlete – this includes EVERYTHING.  Running, swimming, biking, anything involving catching something, hitting something, kicking something… yarg!  I know I’ve complained about this before – but ugh.  One of the reasons I’m doing the marathon is so I can accomplish something that HE hasn’t (forget the fact that he has no desire to ever run a marathon…).

He has better teeth.  This one is ridiculous.  I brush my teeth TWICE a day and I floss.  He has actually forgotten to brush his teeth before and I know he only brushes them once a day.  His candy addiction is as bad as mine (if not worse) and yet… no cavities.  No accusations from the dentist that he hasn’t been flossing.  Nada.  He has perfect teeth. 

Okay – maybe I should throw him a bone here.  His extensive orthodontics work growing up may have earned him the right to good teeth (i.e. being AWAKE through his wisdom teeth extraction that included having his jaw broken and watching blood splatter on his dentist’s safety goggles).

He’s a better cook.  I know I’ve said it before but he’s able to take things that seem like they wouldn’t work together and create a meal that I crave fortnightly! 

** I interrupt this blog post to present one of the funniest scenes from one of my favorite movies – So I Married an Axe Murderer **

Stuart Mackenzie: Well, it’s a well known fact, Sonny Jim, that there’s a secret society of the five wealthiest people in the world, known as The Pentavirate, who run everything in the world, including the newspapers, and meet tri-annually at a secret country mansion in Colorado, known as The Meadows.

Tony Giardino: So who’s in this Pentavirate?

Stuart Mackenzie: The Queen, The Vatican, The Gettys, The Rothschilds, and Colonel Sanders before he went tits up. Oh, I hated the Colonel with is wee beady eyes, and that smug look on his face. “Oh, you’re gonna buy my chicken! Ohhhhh!”

Charlie Mackenzie: Dad, how can you hate “The Colonel”?

Stuart Mackenzie: Because he puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes ya crave it fortnightly, smartass!

** Now back to the blog post **

Last week, on a whim and inspired by the swiss chard dish I made previously – he suggested that we should make a soba noodle + sauteed snap peas (in sesame oil) and red bean dumplings (made from some kidney bean concoction – inspired by my spaghetti and beanballs dish – and rice paper).

So frickin’ good.

I know it looks a little gross.  He plated the dinner with the swiss chard on the bottom followed by the soba noodles and then topped with the dumpling/roll and snap peas.  He made some fab sauce using tamari and sesame oil.

UGH!  I couldn’t even make this dish taste the same if I tried on my own unless he wrote it down.  Stupid culinary talent (that I get to reap the benefits from).

And I realize that I’m just complaining about the same things but yarg!  I think the athleticism thing just came about again because he’s now decided that he wants to do an IronMan next year.  And you know what?  He will totally succeed and probably with much more ease than I will experience doing the sprint triathlon next month.

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