I was going to post pictures from my commencement ceremony but they weren’t really that exciting. My mom probably has a totally different perspective on the event because every time I looked up at her, she had the largest grin on her face like I was accepting the Nobel Peace Prize or something.
My school changed up the commencement ceremony this year and separated the undergraduate and graduate ceremonies. While the president of the university said it made our ceremony more “intimate”, it just made it feel empty… and made the fact that I was wearing a non-breathable fabric with strange hood all the more bizarre.
After a bunch of speeches (and sadly, the president of the SGA gave one of the corniest speeches I’ve ever heard. All of his joked bombed… I cringed for him) – the PhD students were awarded their degrees first. And holy shit – they are some smart motherfuckers.
Every PhD student walked the stage with their mentor (who then “hooded them”) – and as they were being hooded, the announcer gave a brief bio of what the PhD student’s thesis/research entailed. The research ranged from developing some chemical compound that could cure Hepatitis C to public policy research that revolutionized Turkish government’s approach with its citizens (and something with terrorists) to who knows. I sort of spaced out because some of the things these people studied didn’t even make sense to me!
I felt like they should have just thrown us our Master’s degrees and told us to fuck off and actually do something difficult that matters. ha!
Aaanywho – the PhD students did not cause me to feel that my degree didn’t matter. No no… it was seeing some of the people who ALSO got their Master’s degrees that caused me to feel like my university gave degrees to any asshole willing to pay the tuition.
I know that I bitch about at least one of my class teammates every semester. What can I say? I don’t get along with everyone. However, in the 5 semesters and 10 classes that I’ve taken – there has been one douchebag that has stood above the rest. I’ve been referring to him as “king douchebag” because that’s what he is. If there was a country of douchebags, he’d be their president.
He was one of the dumbest guys I’ve ever worked with in class. But even so – I can forgive those that don’t always understand the material as long as they try to learn it. But this guy didn’t. He would ask people for the answers to homework questions. All of his contributions to our projects had to be redone because they were ALL WRONG. Even worse? He was always late in contributing his piece of shit work.
When he was called out on it, he used the fact that he has kids as a reason. Look – I don’t want to dog on parents here but when you register for graduate school, you should understand that there is a level of dedication you must give to school or else why bother? It got so heated in my last group project with him that the motherfucker threatened to have his wife come to the class to show us “what’s up”. I kid you not.
So – guess who fucking graduated? King douchebag! When I saw him, I had a visceral reaction of horror. When they called his name, I refrained from yelling, “You suck, asshole!!”
Anywho – while everyone has given me kudos and finally graduating, I can’t help but feel like its meaningless because they awarded that asswipe a degree too. UGH!
(I realize it is not a very Christmas-y thing to bitch about – I should just be happy for him and his accomplishment. But I’m a mean person, what can I say? )