After chatting about my birth story with some people, I realized I forgot to mention a few things from the birth that made me laugh. Seriously, labor & delivery were much easier than I expected.
Apparently when I pooped on the table, I looked at Jeremy and grunted, “I farted” mid-push. I have no recollection of saying this but it was apparent that the fart was a poop.
The OB/gyn declared that the umbilical cord was wrapped around the baby’s neck twice. That was not funny but the doc quickly pulled an Edward Scissorhands and cut the cord. What WAS funny was the OB/gyn telling me that I had a really long umbilical cord and then demonstrating this by holding the cord in both hands with his arms completely stretched out. It was kind of gross and strange. Jeremy said that not only was the cord wrapped around baby girl’s neck, but that her entire body was wrapped in the cord. She was apparently doing somersaults in my womb.
After baby girl was born, I quickly pushed out the placenta. It was like giving birth to a jellyfish. It wasn’t painful, just very very weird. The OB/gyn asked if we wanted to see it and before we had a chance to say, “no thanks”, he held it up. I responded, “that’s disgusting” because it was. It looked like a bloody jellyfish. I don’t understand people that save their placentas…
Lastly, I completely forgot to give baby girl’s birth stats. She was born February 5th at 11:11 am weighing 8 lbs 6 oz and was 21 inches long. My mom’s reaction? “Whoa – that’s a big baby.”