The Great Name Debate (what the hell should we name our baby?)

Kt’s post today about how they came to name their daughter inspired me to write this post (plus I’m too lazy to upload pictures).

Baby names are frickin’ difficult. It is so permanent. I really feel overwhelmed by this whole idea of bestowing a name upon our child that they will have FOREVER. What if they hate it? I used to hate my name. Kim. It was so blah. It has taken me years to appreciate it mostly because I don’t know many other Kims.

As I had mentioned before, we were sure we were having a boy. For years, one of my favorite boy names was “Oliver”. I still love it. I don’t care that it is growing in popularity. The name kicks ass. I’ve loved it for as long as I can remember. I actually really wanted to use the name “Charles” since it runs in my family but Jeremy said there were TOO many of them but it would have made a good middle name.

Oliver Charles.

But then we had the bomb dropped on us and were told we were having a girl. And oh my god – there are SO many fantastic girl names. My head has been spinning over the possibilities.

We don’t want anything super trendy. I have ruled out any name that is in the top 50 U.S. baby girl names and I frown upon those in the top 100. Seriously – do we need another Madison, Olivia, Isabel or Emma? (Sorry if these are your children’s names – they are lovely, I promise but I’m not kidding when I say that I know MANY people who have named their daughters these names.)

We don’t want anything after very popular pop culture. This rules out Bella (Twilight), Addison (Grey’s Anatomy / Private Practice), Charlotte (Sex & the City), Lorelei (Gilmore Girls) and many others (especially those of Celebrity children).

I don’t want anything that sounds too… fluffy? Weird? This kind of falls in line with trendy because I feel like off the wall names are growing in popularity. So maybe this falls into super trendy?

I want my mom to be able to pronounce the name. I know this sounds silly but she cannot pronounce her Z’s. This surprisingly rules out a few names that I love like Mackenzie, Eliza, Maisie… they would all be Mackenjie, Elija and Maijie.

I really like old-fashioned names but they also seem to be on the rise: Evelyn, Amelia, Audrey, etc. Actually, the ones I really like all got poo-pooed by Jeremy.  I still don’t understand what is wrong with Eloise.

We decided to take a look into our family history. Okay – we looked at MY family history and even then we only looked at my dad’s side. I was sure I’d find a cool old fashioned name in my bloodline. Not only was I wrong – I was presented with the name “Pansy” (my great-grandmother). Let’s just forget the fact that my mom wouldn’t even be able to pronounce it. She would call her Panjy.

But there was a name that always stuck in the back of my mind. And you know what? I don’t want to share it. I thought I’d shout it from the rooftops. Everyone advised me not to share the baby’s name because I’d be bombarded with opinions. I always told people that if someone reacted poorly to my chosen baby name, I’d tell them to go fuck themselves and while they’re at it – to learn some fucking manners.

But now I don’t want to tell. And not because I care about opinions. I just don’t want anyone stealing the name. I think this name is that beautiful.

And I realize that I’m probably the only person that is so enamoured by the name I think we might go with and it has to do with the fact that it reminds me of a special time in my childhood.

It reminds me of when I was taking piano lessons (which I realize seems like torture to some people). I adored my piano teacher (and no – it is not her name. She was lovely and amazing and talented but her name is VERY Korean). I had so much fun taking lessons with her and as a treat, she would play me songs from her catalog of piano music. There was one particular song that I loved very dearly. I could never play it like her (and haven’t tried to in a number of years but now I’m thinking its time to dust off my parents’ piano) and I would beg her to play it.

So the name that I love so dearly? It is the name in the song I love. It is the name that reminds me of that special time in my childhood. And it is awesome.

However, Jeremy thinks we should have a back-up name just in case the baby is born and does not appear to “fit” the name. I don’t really have a back-up. We’ve both compiled lists and agreed on a few names but I just can’t let go of this name.

What are some of your favorite girl names?



Filed under Charm City Kim Breeds

15 responses to “The Great Name Debate (what the hell should we name our baby?)

  1. Molly. Molly has been my favorite name since I had Social Studies w/Mrs. Molly Fortney in 6th grade. She was the sweetest, nicest woman and I always thought it was the prettiest name.

    Grace is my other favorite name, but the fiancé has shot that down several times. So she would be Molly Grace.

    But I 100% want a boy first, and he will probably be Carter.

  2. charmcitykim

    I don’t know if I can steal that name from George constanza.

  3. I think you know Em’s real name. (DM/email me if you don’t.) Her middle is Lucy, which is after my Filipino grandmother, Lucia.

    Some of the other names we liked were Whitney & Sloane, but we’re not opposed to considering those for future eventual daughters.

    I don’t remember what boy names we liked. Evan, maybe? Lucas? Liam?

  4. Brooks and I are planning to use his grandmother’s maiden name as our son’s name. You know, when we have a baby that happens to be a boy. We started to talk about names with his sister a while ago and I had to issue a strong eye motion to shut him up so that he wouldn’t give it away. But since you aren’t my sister in law I can tell. McKinley. I like it for both girls and boys but he thinks it is a boy only thing. If he wants it to be for a boy and it’s his grandma’s maiden name, then it’ll be for a boy.

    As for a girl, ummmm? I love Evelyn, after my paternal grandmother, but it has become so popular. My best friend named her daughter Sophia after her grandmother and kind of hates the fact that everyone else used the name.

    I know there is the social security website that lists names by their popularity for each year since like the 1900s. If there is a generation of names that you like look it up.

  5. I also meant to say that my sister chose Caroline and Carter with her first unknown gender baby. They had a girl first and then three years later they couldn’t think of a better boy name so they used Carter. Maybe you’ll be able to use your boy name later?

  6. You can’t get me started, it’s a sickness. I’m obsessed with names. I read several name blogs, and I have a google doc of hundreds of names that I like or that might inspire other names.

    It sounds like you’re settled on a name, but we should talk. 🙂

    Also, since you like Eloise, you should consider Eloyce. It’s a name somewhere in my family and I really like it! It’s an old name, but it sounds like it maybe has a modern twist.

  7. christastic

    I could have written this post my damn self.
    We had James Holden picked out since our 3rd date.
    I was about 17 weeks pregnant before we decided on a girls name. It was so hard..and don’t bother looking at Jeremy’s lineage. I already did good girls names.

    We didn’t tell a soul his name until after he was born. I loved keeping it to ourselves. It was like our last little secret. I can’t wait til she’s born to find it already sounds lovely 🙂

  8. My vote is Slagathor.

    I always wanted to name a little girl Ayla, after a character in a series of books I read. I’m also a huge fan of Mya and Miri.

    But whatever you do, do NOT name her Becky. (Or ever worse, Becki.) I’ve never met a Becky I didn’t despise, and I’d hate to hate your little peanut before having met her.

  9. Meredith

    I love that you are taking your Mom’s ability to pronounce her name into account. That was a big deal for my mother since her side of the family has strong RI accents and she was worried about them butchering names. My mother was 100% convinced my brother was another girl so never bothered picking out a boys name for him.

    Keep it a secret…people love to ask but love to give their opinions even more!

    I like Audra for a girl. It’s not overly trendy or overly popular. I would love to pay respect to my Nana and incorporate her name into my daughter’s if that day ever comes but her name was Mafalda so it’s kind of tricky!

  10. When I was preggers with my eldest I was deadset on naming her Rayven. Yea I had to be one of those weirdos that misspells a name to make my kid stand out. BUT. I watched Titanic (I hate the sappiness, it gets good once they hit the iceberg) and my favoritest character was the Unsinkable Molly Brown. That’s when I knew my girl name would be Molly. And that is good because when she popped out, she was too blonde to be a Rayven.

    Then when baby #2 came along our girl name we had picked out for a long time was Virginia, after my grandmother. BUT. I watched Romeo and Juliet w/ Claire Daynes (I must only watch chick flicks when I am preggers cause I hate chick flicks) and loved it and thought she was awesome. So my Virginia became a Claire. Which is good because she looks like a Claire.

    With #3 his girl name was going to be Keira because of Keira Knightley in King Arthur. It’s obvious that I needed to stop watching movies when preggers.

  11. prettylittlereckless

    I’ve always loved the name Emma for a girl ever since I was little, but yeah too many people are using it so I’m not sure what I’d use. I also like the name Kate. I like really classic names and not anything trendy. Definitely a hard choice! Oh and I personally think Eloise is a gorgeous name!

    I’m sure whatever you pick will be lovely!

  12. You’re right. it is totally permanent but I’m sure whatever you choose it will eventually grow on you and feel perfect. Good luck!!!!!!!

  13. it does not take too long to learn good piano playing if you have a good piano lesson :-‘

  14. yes! Candies and jewels semmtioes!Two of the names that I got vetoed by all the guys are Madison and Ashley. I think both are lovely names, but apparently there’s a website called Ashley Madison for cheaters! :OAnother name that I used to love but somehow people say is a “stripper name” was Jade. Oh well… I still think all the names are lovely, but I understand if a Daddy-to-be doesn’t want anything that makes him or his friends think of a stripper. Lol

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