Parents Just Don’t Understand (Why are Grandparents so Annoying?)

I know I’ve complained about unsolicited parenting advice before but here I go again.  This time, I’m focusing on grandparents (you know, your OWN parents). 

Grandparents are THE worst when it comes to unsolicited advice.  Even worse?  Many of them refuse to accept many of the changes that have happened in terms of standard child care.  The hardest one to convince some grandparents of (most notably MY parents) is the idea that babies are put to sleep on their backs now.  Annmarie has a bit of a bald spot on the back of her head:

My mom criticized me and said that I shouldn’t put her to sleep on her back.  She and I have actually had the “back to sleep” conversation a number of times but she apparently refuses to believe me.  I tried to explain how the American Pediatric Association recommends putting babies to sleep on their backs and that it is a HUGE thing now.  She refuses to believe me.  This time my dad was in on it and said that it was garbage as well.  They both point out that Jeremy and I were put to sleep on our stomachs (as nearly all babies were when we were tiny tots) and that we both survived.  I tried to point out that since starting the whole “back to sleep” campaign, the rate of SIDS has dropped.  He just wouldn’t buy it.  Apparently my dad got a medical degree when I wasn’t looking.

Jeremy and I have recently figured out that Annmarie doesn’t seem to like when other people hold her for extended periods of time.  She’ll let someone hold her for a few minutes but then starts to cry.  It seems, however, that grandparents don’t like this and refuse to think that perhaps their own grandchild just doesn’t want to be held by them.  Instead I get bombarded with…

“She’s hungry.”

“You put her in uncomfortable clothes.”

“What did you do?!”  (as though I somehow pinched her when a grandparent was holding her when they weren’t looking)

… and a slew of other just as annoying things.  The one that is most irritating, however, is the “she is hungry” comment.  A part of me dies a little whenever someone says this to me.  And that part only dies because it is taking everything in my power not to scream.  Look at my child – she is not going hungry, I can promise you that.  The comment is even more annoying when the commenter knows I just finished nursing her. 

The part about marriage that really sucks is dealing with 2 separate families around the holidays.  I’m not sure how parents of infants get the shaft and are expected to cart their babies all around the state.  Just thinking about upcoming holidays fills me with dread and it just enforces the idea that WE NEED TO MOVE! 

Okay, rant over.  Check out this cute picture of Annmarie from yesterday (see that cute bow?  My mom accused me of hurting Annmarie because it was “too tight”):
Drooly face

Like her drool?  She is drooling a TON lately.  It isn’t very lady-like.  🙂



Filed under Charm City Kim Breeds, Charm City Kim Rambles

8 responses to “Parents Just Don’t Understand (Why are Grandparents so Annoying?)

  1. Meredith

    Is that your future son-in-law in the background of that last photo? I’m sure he’s fine with the drooling 🙂

  2. Are you kidding me? After my sister-in-law popped out a puppy, suddenly EVERY single fucking holiday had to be spent at her house because supposedly she couldn’t travel with the baby. This was also her reason for not coming to family events, even if the event is only a couple hours away. This was all well and good when the kid was 6 months old, but she THREE now and that same excuse is still in play. Luckily, I can’t stand my sister-in-law, so it’s kind-of a win-win situation.

  3. Jaime

    I think it’s even worse when your parents are asian. My mom and dad drive me bat shit crazy! They tell me over and over again “we have raised two kids and you haven’t”. My answer is always various smart ass remarks like “good for you, you raised to so relax and let me raise my one!”. My favorite one is “she’s cold, put a jacket and socks on her!”. Even though they know may baby runs hot. You’re not alone in this. Annoying grandparents are all around.

  4. WOW. This post irritates me, and I’m not married or a parent! (Though my mom does do the same thing with how we’re training our dog.) I can completely foresee my mom doing the same thing – maybe moving far far away is a good option.

  5. Mandy

    My kid is starving too! Has been since he was born. Nor has he talked, walked, or potty trained nearly as fast my parents and in-laws think he should. Apparently there are a lot of starving kids in America, lol! Don’t you just love it when they tell you your child has diaper rash, or a spot somewhere, because how would you know?? I’m sure you never change your own baby 12 times a day, right! My family makes fun of me because I would rather open a book than ask them a baby question from 1964. Leave it to them and we’ll be rubbing motor oil on our child’s rear ends! And I’m with ya on the holiday BS! Christmas is the worst day of my kid’s year! He is never more tired, hungry and irritable than Christmas Day! My husband’s and my family never came around or wanted us around until we had a baby, or at least it seems that way. Also, My mother-n-law has to constantly comment on how every feature of my child’s body is some replica of my husbands family. And the fact that my son like’s bread makes him part of their family! Because you know NO ONE on earth like’s bread! Anyway, glad I’m not alone though I am sorry for your annoying grandparenting.

  6. Oh my god, a Google search led me here about annoying grandparents. My mother in law is apparently an expert on babies, all babies, everywhere. Worst thing, no matter what season or how many layers the kid has on: “She’s cold. I’m putting a blanket on her.” Because you know, when it’s 90 degrees out and the baby is sweating, she is actually freezing. I’m SO STUPID for not realizing this, guys!
    haha. So glad to know I’m not the only one 🙂

  7. Mandy

    I was also led here by a google search on annoying grandparents. I’m 9 weeks pregnant, and I am already annoyed by my mother’s grandparenting. You know what I can’t stand the most? Those stupid pictures people share on Facebook about being a grandparent and the love for their grandchildren that others just can’t understand. You’re a grandparent, not a parent again! Since when did grandparents become the pinnacle of a baby’s life? As if the parents are inconsequential? I don’t get it. It’s not like it’s your kid. It’s your kid’s kid. Let them have all the attention for once.
    Ugh. I’m so glad I live across a continent and in a different country than my mother. And that we’ll be moving away from my in-laws. Shudder.

  8. krista

    Wow. My baby is 18 months old and it is still pretty annoying being around grandparents, but not as bad as when she was younger. So many of the things that have been mentioned got to me too. The worst was when my mil kept saying a variation of “oh she got a scratch? I guess it’s time for me to call social services so I can take her home with me.” Perhaps, this generation of grandparents both feel like they missed out on the joy of having kids and tend to be lacking in social graces.

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